Not all death-metallers compose music in dark dreary basements, you know!

Shows you not to stereotype!

Want people to think you're "metal" and/or mysterious?

Throw some umlauts in your texts.

When people ask what they are, just say "Oh come on, you don't use those?!"

Your welcome.

Rapture!

When you hear the death metal........it's coming.*

What? Were you expecting Captain & Tennille?

Because I figured it out on my own. That's how I know!

Just like that Harold Camping guy did.

People figure stuff out, you know!

*Then again, maybe Jesus will get all passive-aggressive on us and say "Who am I to judge?"