But isn't that exactly what a witch would say?
Be careful here!*
*The election? That is over. Once you have to deny that you are a witch, it is all over but the screamin' and the shoutin'.
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- Contrary Guy
- Seasoned Midwesterner who's interests include baseball, collectibles, Detroit Tigers, heavy music including gothic and symphonic metal, history and offering unsolicited social and political commentary. Corecontrarian@gmail Twitter.com/corecontrarian
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This Is It7 years ago
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Don't know8 years ago
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7 comments:
Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ...Exactly. So, logically...
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch!
I am very weak on Monty Python which (and I could be very wrong and look very stupid here) I sense this is. I approve though and the absurd nature of this is right up my alley.
Cotton Mather did it better though.
FLAWLESS EXECUTION!
Kingsford Charcoal recently announced that they will be issuing a commemorative 320 year anniversary Salem Witch Trials - Cotton Mather approved grill set. It is scheduled for a 2012 release.
Includes a bag of charcoal, lighter fluid and a reprint of his book, Wonders of the Invisible World.
If it wasn't for spectral evidence some of those (young) witches would now have descendants and also Kingsford Charcoal would have to look for another advertising campaign. Don't forget that PBS tie-in show.
Kingsford could always go to Joan of Arc.
As far as the PBS tie-in show... Ken Burns presents... "Putting the Pure back in Puritans".
That fits right in with Burns' New York and Boston (New England) bias. He would be lost if anybody asked him to do a documentary on something like Chinese immigration in California in the early 20th Century. No concept that anybody could have gotten here other than Ellis Island.
Just this week, Louis asked if he could check out a book on Joan of Arc from the library. He said it looked interesting. I saw no reason to say "no".
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